Stepfathers: Three Factors Contribute to Closeness

Although one-third of American children live in a step-family during part of their childhood, little is known about the development of the relationship between stepfathers and stepchildren.

New research from Brigham Young University fills that gap with a study that identified three factors that significantly contribute to closeness in stepfamilies:

• The couple keeps arguments to a minimum
• Mothers help children feel comfortable sharing their frustrations. 
• The stepfather and mother agree on how to parent

Kevin Shafer

BYU professor Kevin Shafer's research on step-families appears in the academic journal Social Work.

"Family roles can be negotiated and there is going to be some bumpiness," said Shafer, who teaches and researches in BYU's School of Social Work.

"The notion that couples should put the couple first and everything else will fall into place is false."

Shafer and BYU grad student Todd Jensen analyzed data from a nationally representative sample of 1,088 children in step-families.

From the children's perspective, frustrations occur when the new dad assumes too much parental authority or when he disrupts the family's normal way of doing things.

"Moms need to let their children know that it's ok to talk if they have a problem with their stepfather because everybody is still trying to figure out this new family dynamic," Shafer said.

And the lack of history between step-fathers and children amplifies the detrimental effects of parental conflict. "Full-blown arguments set up step-families for failure," Shafer said.

Couples typically make one of two mistakes in the transition.

• The first type involves the couple acting as though nothing major has changed. that the new father is a replacement instead of an addition. 
• The second type of mistake is for mom to take upon herself all of the parenting.

The common thread in both scenarios is that the children's voices are missing.

"If you have teenagers, they should be a pretty active participant in discussions of what the family is going to look like and how the family is going to function," Shafer said.

The study contains one pleasant surprise:

Communicating openly and avoiding arguments contributes to closeness regardless of family income or education level.

"It really is the interpersonal dynamic that predicts family closeness," Shafer said. "You can build these bonds in spite of financial challenges."

Links to Understanding Special Needs and Technology

Here are four links to understanding special needs and technology:

• Here’s an article on iPads and visually-impaired students
• Here’s another on Special Ed iPads apps for reading and writing
• Here’s Internet4Classroom’s list of resources for Exceptional Children
• Here’s Jeannette Van Houten’s iEvaluate Apps for Special Needs–a checklist for evaluating apps for special needs students

If your school budget allows for only a limited number of apps and programs this year, choose the ones that will fill out your special needs collections. 

Here are some wonderful apps/websites to use with your special needs students:

• Babakus–a math app for students with dyscalculia or math disability
• One-handed keyboard--a standard desktop keyboard that allows those with limited or no use of one hand to continue typing
• Five-finger typist–self-paced typing exercises for the one-handed
• iPads for autism–the phenomenal impact of the iPad on communication abilities of the autistic.
• Speech and language apps from Mobile Education Store–apps to assist children with higher function autism
• How to make your own assistive technology devices
• iPads and Special Education–a very detailed list of a variety of apps from all different subjects.

Emotional Quotient (EQ): Good for Leaders and Autism

Experts in the field of leadership believe that truly effective leaders possess a high level of emotional intelligence or emotional quotient (EQ) focusing on self and relationship management. 

It’s about social competence. Raising a child with autism can assist with elevating your own emotional intelligence.

The 5 Components of  EQ
Dr. Daniel Goleman, psychologist, brought EQ to the mainstream public in 1995. His research concluded that EQ is made up of five components:

1. self-awareness,
2. self-regulation,
3. motivation,
4. empathy and
5. social skills.

Those with a high sense of self-awareness understand how their emotions impact others and their job performance; they can regulate their feelings successfully. 

How we manage our emotions or regulate them makes the difference for leadership success. 

Goleman states that without EQ, a person can have the best training, analytical mind and be good technically, but won’t make a great leader. 

Some leaders possess these traits naturally; however, can EQ be learned?

How to Teach EQ
As Lori Ciccarelli started training leaders in the corporate setting with regard to EQ, she realised that there was not much offered on “how” to raise EQ. 

There are countless articles and books that address “what” it is but no real tools offered to improve EQ. 

Lori started thinking about tools used with Social Cognitive Deficit Disorders (SCDD) since it is about social competence. 

Over the decades these tools became ingrained in her as she taught her son, which in turn assisted in raising her own EQ. 

The best way to learn is to teach. Since the components that support EQ equate to social competence, then why couldn’t these tools used for SCDD work to raise EQ? 

Lori Ciccarelli started bringing forward these techniques in her leadership and customer service development trainings which have proven to be very successful. 

Those who attend her classes are, generally, excited to head back to their jobs with new tools for success.

• Empathy: Tools that have shown success include Michelle Garcia Winners’ perspective-taking behavioural map to enhance empathy. This tool helps one visually and concretely map out behaviors by showing “how” it can make others feel and the consequences or outcomes associated with them. Taking it a step further, you can ask your audience to develop a plan in which to better display empathy, the next time.

• Social Skills: Another effective strategy to help develop appropriate social skills was created by Winners; imaginary “friend files” in the brain. This technique helps store information about others to help initiate conversations. This interactive exercise of getting to know someone by interviewing them, writing down three items about that person, and then storing the information in an imaginary file in the brain help to initiate future conversations. Also, one can keep a journal or card index file to help organise “friend” information.

• Self Regulation: The Incredible 5-point Scale developed by Kari Dunn Buron and Mitzi Curtis can help regulate moods recognising and managing emotional responses. This tool focuses on the “how” by rating the mood on a scale according to intensity and matching it to solutions. According to the authors, how we act, react, and interact in difficult situations depends on our ability to quickly and efficiently assess what is happening and consider the consequences of our actions. This tool can be extremely effective.

As we focus on social competence for our kids with Social Cognitive Deficit Disorders, we can also benefit by raising our own emotional intelligence. A key to effective leadership.

Darren - assistive communication technology case study - YouTube

The ProxTalker: This exciting device recognises the sound tags to produce the appropriate stored word or phrase. Ideal for picture exchange system users of any age, for communication or as a classroom tool.

Just pick a tag, place it on a button and press - the LOGAN ProxTalker will say the appropriate sound, word or sentence. It extends the world of communication for picture exchange users, taking them beyond the classroom.

Features

Adjustable volume for different environments.
Runs on 4 standard C size batteries for months of operation between charges.
Built-in microphone for adding custom words easily.
Unique programming tags.
Five location buttons allow word or sentence level use.
Rugged construction with shock and water resistant features.
Easy access to vocabulary that can grow with need.
USB connectivity for data exchange and web based downloads and upgrades.

For more information on the Logan ProxTalker, please visit www.logan-technologies.co.uk/.

Non-Verbal learning disorder (NLD or NVLD)

A nonverbal learning disorder or nonverbal learning disability (NLD or NVLD) is a condition characterized by a significant discrepancy between higher verbal and lower motor, visuo-spatial, and social skills on an IQ test. Some proponents of the category believe that this discrepancy is attributable to dysfunction in the right cerebral hemisphere.


NLD involves deficits in perception, coordination, socialisation, non-verbal problem-solving and understanding of humour, along with well-developed rote memory. As most people with Asperger syndrome (AS) fit the criteria for NLD, a diagnosis of AS is often preferred.


In this instance, some researchers assert that an AS diagnosis is more clinically useful than an NLD diagnosis, and argue that NLD would be an example of excessive diagnostic splitting. However, NLD can also occur with other disorders. However, like Asperger syndrome, NLD exists on a spectrum, and those affected can experience it in a range of ways.


Those with an NLD diagnosis can experience some or all of the symptoms, and to varying degrees. Ongoing debate surrounds the relationship between Asperger syndrome and NLD, as research on the condition is ongoing and procedures can differ from AS research.

Symptoms

Non-verbal communication

People with this disability may misunderstand non-verbal communications, or they may understand the communications but be unable to formulate an appropriate response. This can make establishing and maintaining social contacts difficult.


Eye contact can also be difficult for people with NLD, either because they are uncomfortable with maintaining it or because they do not remember that others expect it. Similarly, knowing when and how to use physical contact and recognizing emotions in others and expressing them for oneself can be problematic.

Verbal communication

People with NLD will often tend to lapse into "cocktail-speech," talking too much and too quickly. People with NLD have strong verbal communication skills and must often rely on verbal communication as their main method of gathering information.

Trying to process too many non-verbal stimuli can confuse them.

People with NLD often have strong verbal skills, and learn how to use those to compensate.

Numerical and spatial awareness

Arithmetic and mathematics can be very difficult for people with NLD, and they often have problems with spatial awareness. Problematic areas may include:

• Recognising faces
• Paying attention in noisy environments
• Navigation
• In mathematics: the confusion of X-axis and Y-axis
• Remembering the names and locations of places
• Map reading, or plotting or remembering routes. People with NLD are often best-served by giving landmarks along with repeated directions.
• Estimating the speed of cars while crossing the road
• Self-awareness of where their body is(frequently bump into other people and objects)
• Backing out a car

Motor

People with NLD often have motor difficulties. This can manifest in their walking and running, which are sometimes stiff, or in difficulty balancing. They may also be more likely to run into things, due to judging distances poorly.

Fine motor skills can also develop abnormally, causing difficulty with writing, drawing, and tying shoelaces. NLD sufferers are often labeled as "clumsy" or "stiff".

Anxiety

People with NLD, more than many others, fear failure. They may feel that they have to do too much at once, and then do not know where to start. This allows them to stagnate, and then do nothing. Sometimes they try to multitask and again end up doing nothing, which can lead to frustration.

They may experience the world around them as a chaos, the actions that they must perform well and quickly creating a sense of helplessness.


Clumsiness in performing tasks may be criticised by teachers or in the workplace, causing further fear of failure.

There is a high incidence of suicide in the NLD population.

Good communication in early years key to success at school

Although social background has a noticeable effect on a child's readiness for school, what parents do with their children, even before they begin to talk, is actually much more important.

Children who were taken to the library more often and owned more books at two-years-old achieved higher scores on the school assessment tests when they began primary school.

Parents who foster a love of reading in a child's early years are ensuring they get off to a flying start at school, according to new research.

Researchers discovered that although social background has a noticeable effect on a child's readiness for school, what parents do with their children, even before they begin to talk, is actually much more important.

They also showed that attending pre-school and having parents who taught them a wide range of activities had a positive effect -- whereas extended exposure to television lowered their scores.

The Role of Language in Children's Early Educational Outcomes report (published 30 June 2011) looks at how a child's very early environment -- before their second birthday -- influences their language and school performance.

"One message coming through loud and clear is that how a child learns in their very early years is critical for smooth transition into the educational system," said Professor James Law, Newcastle University, who was one of the researchers in the University of the West of England-led study.

"Although we recognise that traditional indicators of social risk such as material wealth remain influential later on, what you do with your child and how you communicate with them when they're under two is far more important than having a flash car or a detached house in the country.

"This is a very positive message as it gets us away from the belief that a child's educational future is pre-determined by standard measures of socio-economic disadvantage such as income, housing or the mother's education."

Good communication in early years key to success at school, UK study shows

Body Language: Kids With Emotional IQ Deficits

Most of the time our kids aren’t listening to our words nearly as much as we would like them to.

This is not news for most of us but our kids are more likely to be attentive to our posture, gestures and facial expressions and hearing the tone of our voice. This is particularly the case in younger children.

Albert Mehrabian, author of Silent Messages, conducted a series of studies and now claims that the percentage of communication actually sent through spoken words is only seven per cent. Meaning we need to be more aware of body language and non-verbal communications.

Over fifty-five per cent of communications with our children and with other adults, is communicated through our body language and thirty-eight percent is through the tone of our voice.

Unfortunately, this can put a number of kids (and adults) at a disadvantage because they lack the ability to read critical nonverbal cues so essential for getting along in life.

Michele Borba's blog post offers help on overcoming these deficits. Check it out!

Kids With Emotional IQ Deficits | Dr. Michele Borba's Reality Check

Apple offering 'Special Education' Learning for Everyone

Apple has created a custom area for the App Store titled "Special Education: Learning for Everyone." The new section contains five subsections: Communication, Hearing, Language Development, Literacy & Learning, and Organisation.

The apps featured include speech-to-text app Dragon Dictation, assisted hearing app iHearClearly, and handwriting tool iWriteWords, as well as a number of other gaming, reference, and productivity apps.


Mobile Learning for All Learners
While cellphones in the classroom might not be routinely accepted, mobile devices are becoming increasingly ubiquitous as educational tools. And some educators have found the iPad in particular to be well-suited for Special Education programs, as it can provide multiple paths for engagement and expression for struggling learners and special needs students.

Until now, the lists of recommended app for Special Education have been scattered across educators' blogs.

So it's promising to see the recognition in the App Store that this is an important market.

The empathy imbalance hypothesis of autism: a theoretical approach to cognitive and emotional empathy in autistic development

The empathy imbalance hypothesis of autism: a theoretical approach to cognitive and emotional empathy in autistic development. - Free Online Library

Autism
Autism is a pervasive developmental disability resulting from a neurological disorder that affects the normal functioning of the brain. It is characterised by the abnormal development of communication skills, social skills, and reasoning.

Pervasive Developmental Disorder
Any of several disorders, such as autism and Asperger's syndrome, characterised by severe deficits in many areas of development, including social interaction and communication, or by the presence of repetitive, that continues to fascinate researchers, challenge clinicians, and distress affected families.
Empathy
Empathy is a set of processes and outcomes at the heart of human social behaviour.

Social Behaviour
In biology, psychology and sociology social behaviour is behaviour directed towards, or taking place between, members of the same species. Behaviour such as predation which involves members of different species is not social. Fascination with autism is often with the study of empathy because the prevailing theory suggests that people with autism lack empathy.

For example, according to Decety and Jackson (2004), "Children with autism ... display a broad range of social communication deficits, and most scholars agree that a lack of empathy prominently figures amongst them" (p. 90).

The empathy imbalance hypothesis (EIH - External Interrupt Handler ) of autism, in keeping with the theory of mind hypothesis (Baron-Cohen, 1995), proposes that autism involves a significant cognitive empathy (CE) deficit.

However, the hypothesis also proposes, in contrast to prevailing theory, that people with autism actually have a heightened capacity for basic emotional empathy (EE). This combination of a CE deficit and an excess of EE can be termed EE-dominated empathic.

Read the full article here...........